Scars
by Paladins
Summary: Hawke saved both Bethany and Carver, but gained some nasty scars that she feels are hideous.  Fenris decides to show her just how much he doesn't care about them.


"I'll walk you home," Aveline said.

"I'm fine. Go home," Hawke said, pushing her gently. Aveline frowned, shaking her head. "Go. Donnic worries."

"Hawke."

"Fenris can walk me up a little farther and then it'll be ten steps home. I'll be fine. This isn't going to kill me Aveline," she said, pushing her again. Aveline glanced at Fenris, who nodded. Huffing, Aveline moved away to continue down the alleyway that would lead her to her quaint home. Hawke turned to glance at Fenris. "You don't have to stay with me. I'm slow, I know."

He shook his head, motioning to walk. She rolled her eyes and stomped ahead. "Aveline would skewer me if I left you to walk alone with the wound you took. The elfroot might have stopped the bleeding, but you lost a lot of blood, Hawke."

"I'm a big girl," she said, shaking her head. "I can handle myself. I've got me two daggers, and I know how to use them."

"I do not doubt your skills as a rouge, Hawke," Fenris said, walking beside her now. "I also saw how much blood you loss."

She snorted, turning the corner and stared at her door before turning back to him. "Thank you," she said finally. She reached up, kissed his cheek, and the disappeared into the doorway. Fenris watched her go, something tugging at his heart. Hawke was very independent. It probably came from having to care for her family so much. She had to hide away anything that wasn't strength. He turned to leave until he realized he was still carrying her bag. They hadn't let her carry it.

Turning around he made his way back. He saw all the lights were off, and honestly it was going to be morning soon. Bodhan, Sandal, and Orana were probably all asleep by now. And the blasted dog would be sleeping near the door ready to attack if Fenris snuck in from the front. So he swung around up the wall of her garden and glancing at her windows. She really needed to get curtains, he thought, walking over and hauling himself up to he bedroom window. He could have waited until they saw each other again- probably later that day at the Hanged Man- but she was still awake and he didn't really like leaving her alone. No matter how much she wanted it.

He was going to tap on the glass to get her attention, but the window was open. She needed to learn that cities weren't like her country back water towns. Open windows were not safe. He slipped in, setting the bag on her desk and glancing around for her. The bathroom was lit, and her armor was thrown about lazily, her daggers the only thing taken care of. They would be in the bathroom with her. He considered waiting, or leaving, but it dawned on him as he saw her toss out her pants that he hadn't really seen her naked before.

Their first time had been such a frenzy she hadn't taken off her shirt. The same thing when they had made up. He hadn't ever seen her fully. He hadn't thought about it before, but thinking back that seemed a deliberate move now on her part. Curious, he carefully snuck around to peer into the bathroom. She was beautiful, and yet she was always hiding behind clothes that covered all of her from the neck down. Aveline, Carver, and Bethany all had and continued to act wary about it.

She was sitting at the edge of tub, her long curls pulled over her shoulder as she brushed them, as you were supposed to before she'd pin it back up and sink into the water. But what drew Fenris's attention was her back. From her long elegant neck down to, from what it looked like, her upper thighs she was covered in scars. While some where not unprecident, and the torn skin at her thighs hadn't rang any warning bells before, watching the way they twined up into the scars of her back was terrifying. The entire back was ripped apart. Her skin had stretched and twisted with shoddy healing and half magic applied. They were still dark, red, and he could see part of her right arm had the same type of scars.

Unable to stop himself, Fenris walked forward and kissed her torn shoulder. She spun and moved to punch him with brush in hand, but he held her. "What happened?" he asked, trailing his hands down her back.

"What are you doing back?" she said, voice shaky. He hated the way she sounded scared. She pulled herself out of his grasp, turning to stand in the tub and wrapping her arms around herself. "You are supposed to be-"

"What happened?" he said again, far more forcefully.

She shrugged, avoiding his eyes. "I... the ogre," she said finally. "It attacked Mama and Carver and I lunged on its back. Carver got Mama back, and everybody started hounding on the thing. It took interest in me. It tore up my back really bad when I got off of it. Then all the other darkspawn showed up, and..." she trailed off shrugging. "I should probably be dead." She kept stepping back until she hit the side of the tub, where she leaned until she felt the wall against her.

"Leanan," he said, reaching for her.

"Why are you here?" she said, glaring up at him now.

"I was dropping off your bag," he said gently.

"You weren't supposed to see it," she whispered, curling up. Fenris felt his heart twist. "It's so ugly." She whispered the rest, and he didn't catch it as she continued to curl up. She clenched her eyes shut and held herself tightly. Everything was so silent, and she honestly thought he had left. There could be a multitudes of reason he could leave. He wasn't good at comforting, she was being too emotional, but the only one that she honestly thought of was that she was hideous from the chin down.

She tried to get over it, to move passed it. She regrew her hair after the orgre tore most of it out; the black curls falling passed her shoulders and thick again. She kept her face clean and pretty. She was a rouge, she avoided getting hit. She tried so hard to be pretty again. But it didn't matter. Her back was always going to be there though. And it was hideous.

But the water splashed and her head snapped up to see him stripped and reaching for her. "What?"

He grabbed her arms and pulled her forward. She reached up as he pulled her into a hug. He then lowered them into the water and kissed her. She was close to tears, he saw. "You have no reason to hide from me, amor," he said. She sniffed, resting her head against his shoulder. "Te amo. Te amo."

He pushed her hair back, kissing from her cheek down to her neck. His hands traveled down, gently, urging her. "You are beautiful, Leanan." He kissed her again and again until she stopped shivering and clinging to him out of desperation. Out of fear that he would leave her. When she began moaning, bucking her hips against him, he smiled and made sure he sat comfortably against the tub sides. He held her wide hips- her hypnotizing hips and watched as she tried to begin the inevitable.

Except he lifted and turned her, and her wail was enough to make him pull her back to a hug, calming her again. He kissed her shoulder, twined his hands through her hair, and whispered to her. He pushed her black curls over her shoulder, running a hand down her back, memorizing the scars. He kissed those he could reach, the bumps and trenches, as he positioned her. She gave a low throaty moan as they joined, and he matched it with a growl. She began panting, nails digging into his hands as he lifted her. "Tu pulchra," he ground out when she began to jerk back against him, riding him.

He could feel himself coming to the end, snaking a hand around to her coarse curls to find the swollen bud. She bucked and jerked, trying her damnedest to keep from screaming as she rode him. He nipped and bit at her shoulder and neck, sucking at the rough skin of her scar, fighting his own release. He could see his tattoos glowing and sparking with the effort, and then his world exploded with white and he slouched against her, continuing his play in her curls and between her folds until he finally gave a screaming wail of her own orgasm, falling back against him with a moan. "Tu pulchra," he said again against her ear. "So beautiful."

He wrapped his arms around her, and she rose to let him out of her, turning to face him and pushing her hair back. Still hiding it, he thought. It would take perhaps forever for her to move passed it. But she smiled at him, and curled up against him. He rubbed her arms, trailing his hand down to her newest scar, right above her hip. It would heal and disappear eventually. She nuzzled against his shoulder. "I love you," she said. "Thank you."

She shouldn't of thanked him, as if she expected him to do anything else. But he kissed her temple and said, "Your are beautiful, Leanan. I've always thought so."

_A response to the lj kinkmeme:(don't remember the exact prompt) Hawke saved Bethany and Carver, but got a god awful scar from it. She feels ugly, and her LI decides she needs a confidence boost. _

_Used simple latin for the Acranum language._


End file.
